This story was blown out of proportion, and the media,as usually, has created controversy where there isn't. Kids do need some level of "healthy" strictness, which must be differentiated from abusive strictness(the last one is the one who undermines so many people).

Also, there is a stab against this style of parenting as "chinese", bringing in the ethnic and racial controversy there. I think it tells more about those 5thouthand commentators who post negative stuff, rather than about Chua.Oh, and by the way, last time i checked it was 5748 comments there. I come from ukrainian-russian family, and it is quite normal thing motivating kids in the way Chua described.

And i think Chua uses some satire and exaggeration, and smiles at some of the stereotypes. The people should loosen up, and look at the piece again. I guess some of the commentators on WSJ have not even read the piece, only heard how “horrible” it is. Everybody should just chill!

@geroi_asfalta,

Thanks for the link. I accidentally stumbled upon but really liked Adam Minter's review of the book at Shanghai Scrap if you haven't read it -- the first review that's actually made me think the book is likely to be very good despite the editorial.

And... nearly 6000 comments? Amazing. Hard to fault the WSJ for pushing buttons if they can get this sort of response from it.

--dave

This was a great and insightful discussion. Though Chua is now retreating from the essay, there is no question it brought attention to her book and the WSJ. Though she may now innocently claim that things were taken of context, I don't think Professor Chua is as stupid as she professes. For her and the Murdoch rag, the ends justified the means.

One thing that was left out of your discussion (no doubt due to time and focus constraints) is the tremendous pressure non-immigrant Chinese face with respect to college entrance exams. The rate of teen suicides must be very high in China, and is most likely a state secret. Tiger parents are not strictly an overseas phenomenon.

I support the "Chinese mom" parenting. Based on my experience (I'm Chinese, got my Bachelor degree and PhD in Canada), "Chinese Mom" method is very good for training our kids the hard skills (maths, music, language etc). These skills are very difficult to master for an adult. Thus, by giving our kids the hard-to-get skills early in their lives, and allow them to follow their passion later.

When i was doing my Phd, i used to guide undergrad students of all background. For students, there were a lot of calculation, structured procedure planning involved. i found that i never have to worry about erroneous calculation or "messy" planning among "Asian students". With "non-Asian students", most of the time, they said they can do it, but......i learned to re-check all the calculations.....And, this difference was not the result of being educated in different countries, since most of the "Asian students" were immigrants or children of immigrants but finished high school in Canada.

Did anyone notice that Cài Měi'ér does not seem to know the difference between the correct use of a and the? Her book is called Battle hymns of the tiger mother. In her TV interview I heard her saying clearly that the book is one woman's narrative on how she raised her kids and not a prescription for everybody. That being the case, the book should be called Battle hymns of a tiger mother.

But then do most Americnas know the difference?

As a non-Asian American that grew up in Asia, I think that while Amy Chua has some accurate points as to Chinese culture (I've seen it myself), I don't think she is at all a superior parent, or that Chinese are in general superior at anything just because they're Chinese or have strict parents.

While growing up in Asia, I saw plenty of good and bad results with some childhood friends who definitely had a "Chinese mother". Kids committing suicide because their parents were impossible to please: I saw it happen. Nothing for Amy Chua to extol there. Kids crying to their teachers begging for a better grade so their parents wouldn't be angry: I saw it, and it was ridiculous.

I will concede that it seems most Asian parents I knew were a lot more interested in their kids' education than the American parents I knew. That's a good thing. There are definite cultural differences that play into this that cannot be denied. My wife and I are quite attentive to our children's education, and we are seeing good fruit from that. Have yet to call them "garbage." How desperate we'd have to be to do that!

I had a rather easy-going and permissive Swedish mom, and guess what, I practiced clarinet and studied multiple languages several hours a day, not because I was verbally abused (or worse) into doing so, but because I wanted to. Never had to be called garbage to know right from wrong. Sure, I got a few spankings and plenty of harsh words, but they were about my behaviors and actions, not my identity. Any parent who calls a child "garbage" is really speaking about herself. My dad wasn't around much, so maybe it's just genes I inherited that made my an industrious student....and I watched TV and had play dates and got to be in musicals. I now have a 6-figure income, a huge house, and a fascinating career. I think my parents were superior to Amy Chua, because they didn't have to goad me to be successful.

I think it's pretty pathetic if a "Chinese mom" has to resort to abuse upon abuse, and all my "Swedish mom" had to do was let me be me. Go figure.

I don't think Amy Chua has done anything special with her daughters that is not also accomplished by many American parents. She apparently is operating from a place of fear, while my parents and myself operate more on confidence and faith. Chua's style is probably just what she knew. Her essay and book may do well because there is still a mystique in America about Asian culture, because sadly, most Americans don't know much about Asian culture, nor do they care too.

Our children (those of me and my wife) are quite smart and love to study, and we let them have play dates and watch TV. And I don't care what Amy Chua might say to that.

BTW, Sinica is brilliant series. Keep up the great work!