Surrounded by an objectively unpleasant mass of grunting, sweating fleshcakes, Hank's body resented his mind for its foolish attempt to impose such Spartan discipline on them both. And to have the gall to disguise it as self-improvement? Gone indeed were the halcyon days of 2011 with its late nights at the pub and mid-morning breakfasts, replaced with this daily hell of early-morning suffering and pain.

Learning Chinese? Even if you're as generally slothful as some of us you'll still be able to get quite a bit out of this mandarin lesson for absolute beginners to the Chinese language. The reason is that while our dialogue centers around generally athletic behavior, what we focus on linguistically is talking about taking turns, and this is remarkably useful language regardless of whether you're pushing your body to the limits at a health club, or just buying another round of drinks for some friends.